ビジネスで使う英文メール、「自分はこう伝えたつもりなのにきちんと伝わらない」「もっと簡潔に伝えるにはどうすればいいのか」と悩んだことはありませんか?
「プロフェッショナル・ビジネス・スキル」コースを教える講師David Cruseに、英文メールでよく見られる間違え、言葉や表現のチョイスを変えると本来の意味が正しく伝わる事例とアドバイスを聞きました。
*English follows Japanese.
【事例1】同僚へのメールの文末に添える一文
If you have any enquiries, please do not hesitate to let me know. |
◎改善後(Better)
If you have any questions, please let me know. |
【解説】
ここでは、enquiries(アメリカ英語ではinquiries)はふさわしくありません。enquiryは、ある情報について問い合わせする、特に何かを始めるときに使います。例えば、企業に空きのポストがあるか聞いたり、あるいは大学に授業料を聞くなど。please do not hesitate to let me knowも間違っていませんが、同僚に宛てたメールではかしこまりすぎているかもしれません。
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【事例2】近しい同僚に宛てたメールの冒頭
Dear Ms Sarah Jones |
◎改善後(Better)
Hi Sarah |
【解説】
近しい同僚を呼ぶ場合、ファーストネームを使います。英国では、社内のメールでは、特に近くで一緒に働いている同僚に対しては(立場に関係なく)、Hi + ファーストネームと使うのが一般的です。これが社外の人へのフォーマルなメールの場合は、Dear + 名字のみ(例:Dear Ms Jones)を使うのがふさわしいです。関係性が発展していけば、Dear Sarahになり、最終的にHi Sarahとなるように、表現もカジュアルになっていくものです。
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【事例3】クライアントに対するメールの最後
Thank you very much for your kind support in advance. |
◎改善後(Better)
Thank you very much. I look forward to hearing from you. |
【解説】
この例文は、英語でのメールの締めとしては標準的ではありません。また、Thank you …in advanceという表現には少し図々しさを感じます。相手から返事を希望するメールには、I look forward to hearing from youを使うのがスタンダードな方法です。
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【事例4】何かリクエストをする
It would be grateful if you could reschedule the meeting from 8th to 9th March. |
◎修正後(Correct)
I would be grateful … または We would be grateful … |
【解説】
これはよくある間違えです。フォーマルなメールでは、I would be grateful if…(またはWe would be grateful if…)はとても役に立つ表現です。
同じ意味で、インフォーマルなメールではIt would be great if …が使えますが、これが前者と混同しやすいのだと思います。他には、I’d really appreciate it if…も使える表現です。主語をweとするかIとするかは、個人としてのお願いなのか、企業やチームとしてのお願いなのかによって使い分けるとよいでしょう。
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【事例5】締切を伝える
Please send the document until the end of March. |
◎修正後(Correct)
Please send the document by the end of March. |
【解説】
よくbyとuntilが混同して使われているのを見かけます。by the end ofとは、end of(ここでは3月末)の「前までに」を意味します。一方、untilには様々な使い方がありますが、「〇日までに」と伝える場合には使わない方が良いです。You do not need to send the document until the end of March.というような書き方もできますが、これは前者と比べて緊急性に欠けます。
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【事例6】誰かに何かをお願いする
Thank you for your cooperation on this matter. |
◎改善後(Better)
Thank you. / Thank you for your help. |
【解説】
これは、「ご協力ありがとうございます」という日本語のフレーズがそのまま英語に訳された例です。‘cooperation’が特に起きていないのに、この表現をよく見かけます。単純に誰かに何かをしてもらったお礼を伝えるには、ただ‘Thank you’と伝えるのがベストです。
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【事例7】同僚に次回のプロジェクトを伝える
Our boss has asked us to work on this project together. |
◎改善後(Better)
Alex has asked us to work on this together. |
【解説】
例文のように上司のことを指す場合、自分と関連づけてポジションで呼ぶのではなく、ファーストネームで呼ぶのが良いでしょう。もし上司のことを知らない誰かにむけて書く場合には、My manager Alex has asked …や、肩書を入れてThe project manager, Alex, has asked …といった表現が適しています。bossという言葉は、フォーマルなメールでは使いません。
【事例8】同僚へのメールの締めくくり
Yours sincerely, Sarah Jones |
◎改善後(Better)
All the best, Sarah |
【解説】
Yours sincerelyは、例えば、Dear Ms Jonesで始まるようなメールを締めくくるフォーマルな表現です。もっとニュートラルでインフォーマルな締めくくりの表現はたくさんあります。All the bestは、ニュートラルで親しみのあるトーンです。他には、ThanksやBest wishes、あるいはもっとシンプルにBestもよく使います。英国の企業では、ファーストネームのみで締めくくるのが一般的です。
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At the end of an email to colleagues:
If you have any enquiries, please do not hesitate to let me know.
Better: If you have any questions, please let me know.
Explanation: enquiries (inquiries in American English) is the wrong word here. An enquiry is a request for information, particularly at the start of a process. For example, an enquiry to a company about a job vacancy, or an enquiry to a university about course fees. ‘please do not hesitate to let me know’ is good English, but is probably too formal in an email to your colleagues.
At the beginning of an email to a close colleague:
Dear Ms Sarah Jones
Better: Hi Sarah
Explanation: You would refer to a close colleague by their first name. In internal emails, especially to those you work closely with (regardless of their position), ‘Hi + first name’ is the standard greeting in the UK. If this were a formal email to someone outside your company, you should use ‘Dear + surname only’ (Dear Ms Jones). As your relationship develops, you can become less formal (Dear Sarah and eventually Hi Sarah).
At the end of an email to a client:
Thank you very much for your kind support in advance.
Better: Thank you very much. I look forward to hearing from you.
Explanation: This is not a standard email ending in English. Also, saying Thank you …in advance is a bit presumptuous. I look forward to hearing from you is the standard way to end many emails which expect a reply.
When making a request:
It would be grateful if you could reschedule the meeting from 8th to 9th March.
Correct: I would be grateful … or We would be grateful …
Explanation: This is a common confusion. I would be grateful if… (or We would be grateful if… ) is a very useful expression when making a request in formal writing.
An equivalent expression in informal writing is It would be great if … . I think this is where the confusion comes from. You could also say I’d really appreciate it if…. Whether you use we or I in these expressions depends on whether the request is from yourself or your company/team.
When mentioning a deadline:
Please send the document until the end of March.
Correct: Please send the document by the end of March.
Explanation: I often see by and until confused. by the end of means ‘before the end of’. We use until in a number of ways, but to have a similar meaning the sentence should use not until: You do not need to send the document until the end of March. This does not have the same urgency though.
In an email where you ask someone to do something:
Thank you for your cooperation on this matter
Better: Thank you. / Thank you for your help.
Explanation: This is a Japanese phrase that has been translated into English. I often see it used when there is no ‘cooperation’ involved. If you simply want to thank someone for doing something, just say ‘Thank you’.
In an email to a colleague about an upcoming project:
Our boss has asked us to work on this project together.
Better: Alex has asked us to work on this together.
Explanation: You would refer to your boss by their first name, not their position in relation to you. If you are writing a similar sentence to someone who doesn’t know your boss, you might say My manager Alex has asked … or more likely you would use your manager’s job title The project manager, Alex, has asked … The word ‘boss’ would not be used in a formal email.
Signing off an email to a colleague:
Yours sincerely, Sarah Jones
Better: All the best, Sarah
Explanation: Yours sincerely is a formal way to end an email which you started with, for example, Dear Ms Jones. There are many neutral and informal expressions to sign off an email. All the best is quite neutral and has a friendly tone. Other expressions include Thanks, Best wishes, and simply Best. In a British company, colleagues would always sign off with their first name only.